Updated: Sep 24
Hello, friends and a special hello to the mamas. This week, we are kicking off a whole week of how to live with kids. If you're anything like how I was, living with kids can cause a lot of stress and anxiety. We love our kids dearly but I think a lot of us didn't realize how much chaos it can bring to a home. Transitioning from being single to married to then having kids. There's a lot of change in there and how do we create homes that we love to be in and have our kids feel like they love to be in them because sometimes they don't always connect easily. This week, I want to help you with that. I have tried so many different things I have had successes and failures and I want to share with you guys the successes I've had in creating my own Lykke Haven with kids.
I have four little kids ages nine and younger and we have been able to create a home that is both ours and theirs and reduces my anxiety from seeing toys everywhere. I want to share that with you because our homes are made to be refuges. They're made to be havens away from sometimes the chaos of the world and even though our kids may cause chaos inside of them.
I want to share those tips and tricks with you. You can have the toys but still have peace and calm amid the play. There are ways that we can we can do that to help them feel included in our home but not make it scream and shout, hey, kids live here. There is a good balance and I want to share that this week in each of the different rooms in our home.
We're going to go through mudrooms. We're going to go through living rooms. We're going to go through bedrooms and play rooms and how can those be kid friendly and have you have less stress, less anxiety around those spaces because I know for me, those spaces used to cause so much anxiety and I didn't know what to do. I have overcome that and I want to share with you how I did that. We're also going to be sharing our own tips with our whole community because we can only learn from each other and help each other out.
To start, the biggest tip I have for you in all of this comes from Human-Centered Design. The quote that I shared in the earlier weeks of this live sessions and that is from Melinda Gates. She said, “when you let people participate in the design process, you find that they not only have ingenious ideas about what would really help them.” Let me say that again, “When you let people participate in the design process, you find that they often have ingenious ideas about what would really help them,” and that goes for kids too. The home is a place for kids as well.
If you have kids that are, I would say older than five years old or five years and older, start asking them, “What are some of the thoughts you and feelings you have around our home? Are you able to do the things you want to do in our home? Is there something missing that you would love to add to our space?” Encourage them in their thoughts because if they feel like they can participate, they'll start opening up to you and really telling you what they would love in your home. So, encourage them by saying, “you really do like playing with magnet tiles and your builds are just filled with imagination. Let's make that easier for you. How can we make it easier for you to create more builds? Let's work together on figuring out a solution and where those can go.” Just encouraging them and things they love to do, that way and start just giving them ideas. “Well, what if we did this or that and just start brainstorming together.”
I know when 2020 hit, I wanted to just create a more enchanting outside area for my kids. So, we went through this innovation workshop if you will of how what can we create and we voted and we talked through it. We figured out a solution together as a family with my three older girls. In the end, we chose to make a fairy garden for them. When you let them be included in the design process, they have such great ideas and you can implement them and talk about how you're feeling. Maybe you're like, “I love that you love Legos. Let's work together to figure out a solution because mommy gets hurt every time she steps on one of those Legos or we tend to leave them out. How can we figure out a solution that you can let your builds be halfway done but I don't step on them or your little brother doesn't destroy them before you're completed.” Just start talking through these together and they'll feel like they're so included in the family and really love the solution that you guys put together.
If you have kids that are younger than five, how do you start these systems? That's when you start observing them. Observe their play. What do they like to play with? If your kids are too young, maybe go visit friends with kids that are a little bit older. How do they play? Start getting systems in place now, like toy rotations, to understand how can I cause or how can I already develop the solutions for our family before our kids are older when I can ask them? Just observe. How do they play? What do they like to play with? How do older kids play? And how can you implement systems already in your home that just really support them.
Let's be honest, we love our kids dearly and we want to see them play. We just don't want the anxiety of toys everywhere all the time because then, we're focused on the anxiety of the stress of the toys rather than really being in the moment, really being present and giggling with them while they play.
So, we're going to go through those rooms and I hope that you'll join me. Please share this with other mamas. Let's help each other out to create our Lykke Havens amid having kids, amid the anxiety. Let's minimize the anxiety so that we can get back to that floor, so that we can start giggling, and we can dive into the imaginations that our kids have with them instead of stressing about all the toys, all the messes. I would love to help you with that so that your place can be a refuge even inside your home.
I hope you'll join me this week as we go through each of the rooms. Tomorrow, we're going to be going through mudrooms, all the coats and all the shoes and what do you do with all those things. Your action step for today is to just start asking your kids about your home in general. “How do you feel about our home? What do you feel like you can't play with or what do you love to play with? What kind of things would you like to add to our home?” Just start the conversation with them because that's where it's going to start. If you involve them, things will be go so much smoother than if you side step and steamroll over them. That's where we're going to start. We're going to start in the mudroom and I hope that you'll join me. Share this with other mamas. This week is going to be a fun week as we dive into Kid Friendly Spaces. I will see you guys tomorrow at 1 PM live this time.
Thank you so much for letting me record this for you and I can't wait to talk to you again tomorrow. Have a great rest of your holiday weekend.
Lykke Haven Design is a full service, purpose-driven interior design firm serving clients in West Michigan. We work with clients from Ada, to Grand Rapids, to Holland (and the occasional out of state). Our mission is to create Intentional Interiors curated with a Meaningful Mission that Cultivate Connection. We do this through a process driven by Human-Centered Design. We would love to discuss your next project and how we can help.
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